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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23747626">Too Long too Late</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Peaches_Pits/pseuds/The_Peaches_Pits'>The_Peaches_Pits</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst with a Happy Ending, Comfort, Dense Kuroo, Didn't Know They Were Dating, Dreams and Nightmares, Fake Dating, Feelings Realization, KuroKen Week 2020, Kuroo Tetsurou is a Mess, M/M, One Shot, Realization, THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED, five times one time, pining Kenma</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 15:49:04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,353</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23747626</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Peaches_Pits/pseuds/The_Peaches_Pits</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Kuroo has finally realized. On this special insomniac filled night, he realized he's in love with Kenma. Nothing but fake dating the woman who lies beside him. So many years he and Kenma spent together and he didn't know they were dating. They drifted apart slowly and Kuroo is now nearly out of college. Kenma tried five times to regain what they once had or to make Kuroo think about what they had. It took this final one time but Kenma didn't know that. Kuroo visits and there was only one bed available so Kuroo is couch-bound. Kuroo alone, full of his thoughts, and finally able to sleep has a nightmare. He hopes a terror can bring him some sort of familiar comfort he's been missing for years.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Kuroken Week 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Too Long too Late</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Minor tw: Kuroo attempts to suffocate himself and slam his head  <br/>Yo, guess who's doing this last minute! Me duh. I couldn't participate in time for this week so I decided to do every day into one big old one shot! Kuroken angst is fun please enjoy.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Sweet and suffocating silence is all Kuroo wished for. Since childhood, he developed a peculiar habit that gave him exactly what he wished for. An equation that even the simplest of blockers could understand. A pillow on each side plus Kuroo smashed between equaled a solace that he could not replicate elsewhere. That was until insomnia, nightmares, and life truly hit as he got older. That sweet solace was nothing if it wasn’t aided with sleeping medication. A solace and a dose from a doctor tended to do the trick. That was until this night. He has had his fair share of slip-up insomniac nights. It tended to be from meds failing as meds may do, but tonight was different. Kuroo was wishing he could blame the medication but he was aware that wasn’t the case. This was a problem that they couldn’t solve. He was trying to drown the world out between pillows but that wasn’t solving anything either. The pounding migraine and start of a sleepless night weren’t originating just from his mind. Within a chest, a heart was aiding in an all-nighter of misery. Kuroo after so long was finally realizing something. He was finally realizing he has been in love with Kenma. Not recently, but he has been in love with Kenma since he can remember. Pillows had always been his escape from the real world around him. To leave Kuroo in his safe little space to himself. Drift to sleep and not hear a peep from anyone or anything else. The downside is if Kuroo wasn’t asleep, the world could only censor itself so much. The soft breaths of his innocent girlfriend, for example, snuck through the feathered walls he hid behind.</p><p>They had established that this relationship wasn’t real. Fake dating just for the minor benefits. Both were alone in their twenties and needed family to get off their backs. With an agreement, they could fulfill the need to bring someone polite home for the holidays. Rent costs also lowered and any need for intimacy or human touch was in their shared bed. That was all it came down to in the end. Nothing more it was quite empty from an outside perspective. Kuroo knew just how empty it was from the inside as well. He has gotten used to the feeling of an empty organ inside of his chest until right now. This beating, aching, and heavyweight muscle was nearly ready to pop from his throat. Gagging on it as if he was a cat ready to regurgitate a hairball. The pain was insufferable and strong and it was matching the intensity of a head. A head was overflowing thoughts of idiocy. Kuroo was just now feeling pent up love at the worst time. Pushing at pillows to try and cut off his breathing passage. It was the only way out of this one-sided embarrassment. The thing Kuroo was also processing was that this feeling tearing him apart inside wasn’t one-sided. Or it wasn’t before. 
Kuroo didn’t know they were dating. He didn’t realize, fathom, or gather the pieces that him and Kenma had previously dated for almost ten years. Baby engagements with ring pops and marrying eachother in the sims was nothing at the time. It now was everything and all that Kuroo wanted. Why did Kuroo think the passion in words, lips, and touches were just Kenma experimenting throughout all of high school. How did casual exchanges of I love you’s become so distasteful to the tongue? Why did they seem as offensive as a slur if Kuroo dared think of speaking it? That was because they were just words before. Words of a dense idiotic Tetsurou who didn’t know Kenma, on the other hand, carried complete truth in his. That was in the past and things have changed. Things got rocky before college and two started to part. Kuroo currently, even if he was gushing like an emotional teenager, was a grown man only months away from graduating. Kenma was successful and thriving to a point Kuroo had never imagined. He was overwhelmed in pride for what his best friend had made for himself. When not full of pride he also apparently was gushing in love for the man as well. In this realization of the night, Kuroo was starting to put more pieces together. These pieces sadly didn’t belong to a puzzle with a beautiful and knowing outcome. These pieces were the combination of a locker that has never been able to be cracked. Kuroo was now cracking his own locker and opening the door to see a dedicated shrine of memories he repressed.</p><p>There were around five times that Kenma had tried to confess his love. Tried desperately to make Kuroo fall in love with him back. Tried to make Kuroo realize he was serious. Tried to get Kuroo back into his life. Tried to get Kuroo to stop drifting so far away. Attempts were brought out with vulnerability, power, weakness, passion, and finally raw real love and emotions. Kuroo was panting gently opposite of his violent shaking from the rest of his body. How had he let himself miss this all? How had he let it come down to this moment? One of many tears were starting their pathway down a cheek. So many times and so many sets of five yet this one time finally did it. An invite for some diner, film a video, and catch up is what made it all click? This last resort out of so many failures of passion projects. But it worked. It finally fucking worked Kuroo spoke. Words barely audible to not disturb the woman next to him but he needed to let them out. He needed to let something out. He was debating to plan a love confession or simply wait another ten years. He has left Kenma in a demise similar to this for over ten years? Was he too late for emotions to be returned? Birds chirps were now breaking through the walls. It was a reasonable time for coffee now at this hour. He had forgotten to grab sugar last grocery run. He didn’t think he was deserving of anything sweet at this moment. If he wanted anything else in his coffee he could salt it with these tears.</p><p>...</p><p>There was only one bed. The name assigned to that bed was not Kuroo’s. That bed did not have an invite for Kuroo either. It was Kenma’s and only Kenma’s. Leaving an exhausted Kuroo, at eleven pm after a harsh past thirty-hour mark, on the couch. With the amount of cash poured into it thankfully it was nice. A brand that was associated with dollar signs when looking at a tag. It was pleasant, but it was still just a couch. Kenma gave a gaze at his silent friend sipping from a coffee container. He was sensing something was wrong. Kuroo knew Kenma was watching. Kenma had no clue on what pits of hell were burning inside his skull. Kuroo with a nod of acknowledgment made himself comfortable. Kenma groaning got the notice quickly this was how their week would be together. Kuroo was feeling guilty once again. It wasn’t Kenma’s fault that Kuroo couldn’t scrounge up a response. Kuroo was going through things he had already put Kenma through too long ago. Sooner or later Kuroo needed to experience the same burn. Within a container for caffeine, it was replaced with the opposite. It was a pretty disgusting mixture to the taste but it was working. Sleepytime tea mixed with almost a container of melatonin drops. Enough to send a bear into hibernation during summer and enough to finally make a cat drowsy. On Kenma’s way out Kuroo requested lights out. With the enclosing of a room in dark eyes could rest. Slowly blending in with the rest of the room a vision became nothing but pitch black lids.</p><p>Kuroo was screaming. All he could process was letting out something to sound off his cry for help. Fingers piercing so harshly into pillows they were scratching at cheeks. Again. Another nightmare. Nothing but shakes worse than any fever could cause. Similar to a fever but not exactly Kuroo was also wet. Not in any normal cold sweat, he was sopping and so were sheets. Screaming, scratching, shaking, and soaked. Not only had he had another nightmare but he had wet the bed. Again. The worst part of the bed that he was screaming and wetting wasn’t even his own. Urges to cut off breathing and end suffering had always been present. Even if Kuroo was only ten he was tired of being scared to sleep. He was giving in. The cry for help wasn’t working. Pushing surfaces closer it would help. He swore it was going to help. End these terrors once and for all. Trying to subtract himself from the equation, Kuroo ended up being all there was left. With every bit of might in their nine-year-old owner’s body, they swiped. They ripped apart hands from cushions and tossed them half away across the room. Kuroo was still shaking refusing to look up at the person who had done it.</p><p>“Tetsu! Tetsu! It’s okay!” Desperate words from such a young voice were shouted towards his direction. Nothing was blocking their entrance into ears. They came in, and sat, waiting for Kuroo to further progress. Shivering was becoming paralyzation instead of stuck in a spot in which he couldn’t move. Why would he continue? He had just wet the bed with Kenma his new best friend over. Kenma wasn’t meant to see him this weak? Why did they share a bed why did he agree? He knew this was going to happen. Pralzation broke a limp figure rose. Starting as a ball on his stomach he morphed into an upright one in the fetal position. In shame and punishment, he refused to stop gripping wet pajama pants. He was done. Tears were starting and rimming his eyes. He couldn’t see how this could get any worse. He wanted to go back to being in a state of unconsciousness. A neck popped at the distance it reared back preparing to slam forward. Knees weren’t a wall or a bed frame but they were something. A button was then pushed. It was the perfect button it was the power button. Arms wrapped around a neck. A neck then broke down like the rest of Kuroo. He hadn’t realized but he was holding back uncontrollable sobs and pants. His mind had gone blank but his body had a lot to say. The only thing a mind was able to process was these arms were new. Same as always of warm, soft, and comforting, but they were small. They weren’t a family member or anything they belonged to someone new. They belonged to Kenma. Who had yet to get angry at him or upset in the slightest. They belonged to Kenma his new best friend who just stopped him from hurting himself twice. Whining like an injured dog he watched. A figure lifted his own head and locked eyes with him. Sniffling softly a boy came closer. Softly skin pressed against skin. Kuroo tensed at the movement but, lips softly pressed against his cheek.</p><p>“Whenever I’m sad my mom kisses my tears. You...you look like you needed that. Was it Okay?” No response. Just more tears. rolling, pouring, and soaking the upper part of a body as well. Kenma’s arms still so new of affection opened hesitantly before Kuroo. Kuroo didn’t hesitate on the other hand. Diving into a hold he found a new solace. A nice and perfect solace of comfort. Kenma would hold that title for many years to come.</p><p>“KUROO TETSURO WAKE THE FUCK UP!” These words from Kenma were much less soft. They were shouted from the voice of a man no longer a child either. He was back in reality and last time Kuroo checked it wasn’t fun. Eyelids opening had a guest with them. Water so much water. Saltwater or simply put more tears hitting puckering and shuddering lips. Kenma on top of a lap brought Kuroo to heavier tears. He managed to piss his pants and the couch. All during a nightmare just like old times. Kenma was not purposely but actually rubbing it in. Weakly hands were grasping for a waist to get him off. Kuroo just wanted to be alone.</p><p>“Kenma go. What time is it? I’m fine.” Choking with every word Kenma quickly smelled the bullshit. 
</p><p>“You screamed my name on the top of your lungs! My stream heard it! What was your dream? Kuroo you wet yourself it’s been years what’s going on?! Talk to me!” Kuroo was fighting so hard. Wanting to toss his best friend away and fight his battle on his own. It may be the lack of sleep it may be the aching in his chest but he felt like being blunt.</p><p>“I’m in love with you I always have been. I’m an idiot and just realized too late. If…” He was losing it. All composure, “IF I’M TOO LATE TELL ME NOW AND LET ME GO HOME!” Screaming similar to a dream’s cry for help something else felt similar. There were some changes in this familiarity though. Two arms that were Kenma’s were around Kuroo’s neck but they weren’t new. They were something he missed. Missed so badly this comfort. Missed so badly the old times.</p><p>“It’s late don’t yell. Let’s clean you up. You can sleep in my bed with me.” It was that easy. That was all it took. Kuroo wishes like a dream he could get a kiss but, it was late. They’ve already had so many kisses anyway. Hopefully, tomorrow would bring a sweet kiss with coffee that would be different than any other kiss. One with meaning. One with the truth. And one with love that wasn’t just on one side. Kuroo never thought an insomniac night followed by a nightmare could have brought him a dream he almost missed.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I've been wanting to write a Kuroo nightmare fic for AGES and finally got to. Yes, I think Kuroo is a bed wetter. Yes, I think he wet the bed for a long time. Yes, he did, in fact, piss the couch, then change pants, and cuddle in a massive king-sized mattress with Kenma. Kuroo and I are nightmare buddies and I wrote this on no sleep but I hope you sleep well and rest well- Peach</p></blockquote></div></div>
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